Shame on you. These three simple words can have devastating effect on an individual’s psyche.
But why is that? Some theorists argue that feeling shame is a pathology, a condition to be cured. Others dismiss it as a useless, ugly emotion. A research team at the University of Montreal and UC Santa Barbara’s Center for Evolutionary Psychology (CEP), however, suggest something altogether different. Shame, they argue, was built into human nature by evolution because it served an important function for our foraging ancestors.
Living in small, highly interdependent bands, the researchers explain, our ancestors faced frequent life-threatening reversals, and they counted on their fellow band members to value them enough during bad times to pull them through. So being devalued by others – deemed unworthy of help – was literally a threat to their survival. Therefore, when considering how to act, it was critical to weigh the direct payoff of a potential action against its social costs. (1)
Shame on me. Because I value your opinion.
Not because I value you. But because I value me and will need your help.
But this is not true shame. But a hypocritical stance for personal survival.
True shame never comes from the outside.
True shame is always internal and personal.
I do not feel shame for what you might think about me. But because of what I know about myself. I do not care about your opinion. I only care about mine.
Only a God can truly be ashamed.
Standing on top of existence.
Conversing with Himself.
There is no one to converse with.
And yet, someone is talking.
A tear dropping.
A cosmos laughing…